1. image: Download

    Well, obviously.
(Trafalgar Street, Brighton.)

    Well, obviously.

    (Trafalgar Street, Brighton.)

     
  2. I always thought Daleks were full of a squidgy, ugly, unpleasant bubbling pile of shite. Now I know for sure they are. Yes, Dalek cupcake holders and stands. The BBC cannot be trusted not to utterly screw over something like Doctor Who in the name of making money. #daleks #cupcakes #bbc #doctorwho #tweebegone #twee

    I always thought Daleks were full of a squidgy, ugly, unpleasant bubbling pile of shite. Now I know for sure they are. Yes, Dalek cupcake holders and stands. The BBC cannot be trusted not to utterly screw over something like Doctor Who in the name of making money. #daleks #cupcakes #bbc #doctorwho #tweebegone #twee

     
  3. image: Download

    If you need to be reminded of such ‘profound’ things by having them framed or emblazoned across your crockery, you’re definitely doing it wrong…

    If you need to be reminded of such ‘profound’ things by having them framed or emblazoned across your crockery, you’re definitely doing it wrong…

     
  4. image: Download

    I suppose it was only a matter of time before the two great fetishes of twee-minded-women everywhere were combined in one horrendous handmade item. Yes, Fifty Shades of Grey cupcake toppers. Where would hungry, randy women be without them?
Two-hundred-and-fifty shades of shite.

    I suppose it was only a matter of time before the two great fetishes of twee-minded-women everywhere were combined in one horrendous handmade item. Yes, Fifty Shades of Grey cupcake toppers. Where would hungry, randy women be without them?

    Two-hundred-and-fifty shades of shite.

     
  5. Ok, so, I could possibly get on board with a cupcake pincushion if it worked as a voodoo doll for all other cupcakes?

    Ok, so, I could possibly get on board with a cupcake pincushion if it worked as a voodoo doll for all other cupcakes?

     
  6. image: Download

    These people would smear red lipstick on the Mona Lisa, wouldn’t they?

    These people would smear red lipstick on the Mona Lisa, wouldn’t they?

     
  7. image: Download

    "This old furniture is so boring and old-fashioned…"
"…I know! I’ll paint it grey. Everyone loves grey…"

    "This old furniture is so boring and old-fashioned…"

    "…I know! I’ll paint it grey. Everyone loves grey…"

     
  8. image: Download

    How wonderfully twee….or is that twea..?  Not only has this delightful creature taken up residence in a vessel not intended for clay vermin but he is gently asking us to not be alarmed by his presence and to resume enjoying our delicate oriental infusion. The laughs! The jovality! Breaks the ice at parties I am sure.
Handmade apparently.  By whom I wonder..? A cack-fingered imbecile wearing boxing gloves perhaps..?
The postcode suggest the artist of this charming item of bijouterie is local. Great! That means I have time to put the kettle on, run round there and punch their face and return home in time to enjoy a freshly brewed cuppa…..in my new twee mouse character teacup of course.  Don’t give up the day job. I’ll notify you when Franklin Mint have a vacancy.

    How wonderfully twee….or is that twea..?  Not only has this delightful creature taken up residence in a vessel not intended for clay vermin but he is gently asking us to not be alarmed by his presence and to resume enjoying our delicate oriental infusion. The laughs! The jovality! Breaks the ice at parties I am sure.

    Handmade apparently.  By whom I wonder..? A cack-fingered imbecile wearing boxing gloves perhaps..?

    The postcode suggest the artist of this charming item of bijouterie is local. Great! That means I have time to put the kettle on, run round there and punch their face and return home in time to enjoy a freshly brewed cuppa…..in my new twee mouse character teacup of course.  Don’t give up the day job. I’ll notify you when Franklin Mint have a vacancy.

     
  9. image: Download

    A bib. Perfect for when you’ve stuffed your perfect vintage-themed child full of cupcakes and they vomit them all back up again. At least it will all match, right?

    A bib. Perfect for when you’ve stuffed your perfect vintage-themed child full of cupcakes and they vomit them all back up again. At least it will all match, right?

     
  10. UPCYCLED RETRO G PLAN TEAK CORNER UNIT
Oh yeahhhhhh. Because nobody likes G-plan do they? So old-fashioned and worthless. I know, here’s a good wheeze, let’s cover it with snot-green paint and suddenly they’ll pay a fortune for it.
Errr. You might want to check out prices for original G-plan and put. away. the. paintbrush.

    UPCYCLED RETRO G PLAN TEAK CORNER UNIT

    Oh yeahhhhhh. Because nobody likes G-plan do they? So old-fashioned and worthless. I know, here’s a good wheeze, let’s cover it with snot-green paint and suddenly they’ll pay a fortune for it.

    Errr. You might want to check out prices for original G-plan and put. away. the. paintbrush.